Boredom
Boredom
How to Perk Up Your Interest
The next time you feel bored, consider the daily routine of eighteenth-century gentlewomen, as described in Samuel Richardson's book Clarissa: Six hours for rest; three hours for "praying, meditating, reading pious books;" two hours for "domestic management;" five hours for "needle, drawing, music;" an hour for "visits to the neighboring poor" and the rest of the day in conversation, reading aloud and paying and receiving social visits.
It's no wonder that letters written by women who lived at the time refer to the tedium of women's lives.
"When there ceases to be a sense of newness, challenge and excitement, we all get bored," says Susan Heitler, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Denver and author of the audiotape Anxiety: Friend or Foe?. Our minds need a steady diet of new input the same way that our bodies need fresh and nourishing food, or we feel stressed.
Boredom isn't fatal, says Harriet Braiker, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in private practice in Los Angeles. "But psychologically, it can be very painful."
Boredom may contribute to depression or erode self-esteem, says Camille Lloyd, Ph.D., professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the University of Texas Medical School at Houston.
PRESCRIPTIONS FOR BOREDOM
Boredom is curable, say doctors. And you have plenty of options.
Give yourself antiboredom assignments. For generalized boredom, Dr. Braiker prescribes the following remedy: "Every day, do two things that are different from the usual--preferably, activities that you can discuss with others--like reading a news, travel or sports magazine; listening to new music or taking a class."
Make a wish list. Write down new things that you would like to try--see that new Chinese film at the art-movie theater, for example, or check out the espresso bar across the street after the show.
Think ahead. For activities that require advance planning, start now, says Dr. Lloyd. If you've jotted down "learn French," for instance, pick up the phone, call the local community college and ask them to send you a course catalog so that you can sign up for next semester.
Recruit your spouse. If part of your problem is that you're bored with your marriage, part of the solution is to make your antiboredom plan of action a joint effort, says Dr. Heitler. Once a week for three months, do something new together: Go horseback riding, try country line-dancing, visit a local art museum, volunteer at a homeless shelter, picnic with friends or rent mountain bikes, for example. After three months of weekly adventures, single out the activities that you enjoy the most and continue to pursue them together.
Expand your circle of friends. If you're like most people, you need more novelty than one person can provide. That's where friends come in. Others can provide you with new insights, ideas and inspiration, keeping you interested and interesting, says Dr. Lloyd.
Get out of the house. Staying home--to work out of a home office or raise the kids--can be gratifying. But the isolation can lead to boredom, says Dr. Heitler.
If work keeps you cloistered at home, join a local professional association. Or start a dining club--invite neighbors, friends and business acquaintances to get together regularly (once a week or once a month) for meals.
To break out of the child-rearing routine, Dr. Heitler suggests arranging play groups with your friends and their kids. Take day trips with them. Go to the library. Or invite friends to do laundry or cooking together.
Bring novelty to work. If it's the workplace grind that's wearing you down, look for something new to do at the office.
"Ask yourself if there is a new challenge to be had in your current job," says Dr. Lloyd. You might be able to add to your responsibilities or take on a new set altogether.
If you're in phone sales, for example, maybe you could volunteer to train new salespeople part of the time. Or go to night school and take courses in a new but related area. Then let your boss know that you're in the market to try out your new skills. Or take on a volunteer position until you get more experience that can be parlayed into a new, less boring job.